Parker turns one!

Parker, you have grown so much in so little amount of time. You are 26+ lbs, you have a head full of wavey blonde haor, and your eyes are still that deep blue that captivates everyone you meet. You are going to turn one year old in less than a month! Taller and stronger than most kids your age.

Favorite words right now: mama, dada, nana

Favorite sounds: too many to list! One thing you have mastered very well is the immitation of sounds.

Favorite activity: being outside. Crunching leaves. Feeling the grass. You cry when we bring you back inside..

Your attitude is getting stronger each day; more opinionated as time goes by. You are as stubborn as all get out.

Oh, and did I mention you were walking everywhere now? Started with little steps all by yourself about a month and a half ago. Last week you really got brave and have been walking most everywhere. You play a game of walking obstacle course, where you will walk in a pattern from one object to another for a good 10 mins.

Last month you had the flu and then strep throat, back to back. It was so sad to see you so sick, with little that I could do about it. I wish it was me instead of you. You sure were cuddly though during that time, which is a rare sight lately.

Parker, we love you more than life itself. Happy birthday little angel.

4 months later..

Parker you have grown so much! You started out an 8 lb bundle of beauty and happiness, and it just gets better and better each day.  When you smile at me, my heart melts. You have brought our family so much happiness in a time that was so stressful.  I could care less what people think about me, because I just feel sorry for them that they do not get the privilege of knowing and loving you. You are the best thing that has happened to your dad and I.

Rolling over has been your most recent adventure. You toss, you turn. Finally you made it over a few grunts later. That was a few weeks ago. From that time, you have now mastered the art of turning on your belly! Head held high, you are so proud of yourself. Today you have been flip flopping around the floor and laughing uncontrollably at the silliest things.

You smell so good! Might be weird to say, but I've never loved a smell like I love your baby smell. So soft and comforting to your mom who loves you. 

We have been letting you sniff and get a feel for the horses and dogs. With Lilly  your dads Clydesdale,  you are in awe of her when she walks up and blows on your face. I don't thing your big o blue  eyes could get any bigger when she comes to see you. With Cooper,  he loves to smell your baby scent and gently lick your toes when I look away. I think he knows you are pretty special and cannot wait to get more time with you.

You love your daddy so much. When he comes in the room, you light up. He goes out of the way to make youn laugh and laugh with his silly voices and ways. He loves you more than life.

I love you more and more every day Parker. I never thought I'd love you more than the day we gave birth to you. Ive been proven wrong every day, every hour I'm with you.

Jesus please watch over my Parker man and keep him safe. Guide him to be the strong man of God I have prayed he will become. Give him the ability and will to love others like Jesus loves him.

-Your Mom

Sleepless...

When people said while I was pregnant that I needed to enjoy my me time and sleep, I really should have listened. Having a baby takes that all away. I miss sleep. I miss long naps. I miss being able to take a shower without having to worry about a screaming human being.

But.

It's worth it. Parker is awesome, such a good baby and so advanced already for his age. Love our baby boy, but really dislike these nights of sleeplessness.

Love you Parker.

Welcome to the family...

Parker.

Parker Isaac Allen Hughes. Believe me, we tried to pick just one name for the middle. Wasn't happening.

Parker was 8 lbs, 21 inches. He is so perfect, it's almost not real.

I haven't been around alot of babies, but everyone tells me he is the most perfect they've seen. His complexion and features right from birth were perfect to me. I'm sure I'm biased though.

I never knew how much I'd love this kid. As soon as they showed him to me, dancing him out of my belly, I had more love then I knew what to do with. 

March 16th, 2014, our plans for a natural birth were altered. I had been in labor since Thursday night (13th), and in active labor since the 16th at 2am. He came via Caesarian section because as of 9pm, I was not dilating past a 6. I had been at a six since 3pm. He was stuck, and it was more pain laboring through a transition than I'd ever felt with anything. Determined not to have pain meds, at that point I was wore out. But once we had the c section talk with dr laws, 9:00 was here and we were rolling into the OR. Kelly was sent with me, donned in scrubs and the cutest hat you'll ever see (pix below ). I was trying not to hyperventilate. We had a blessing from God, her name was Emily. Emily was the best anesthesiologist around. My doula Jodie, who had been there through everything, said she was a Godsend. She was. Emily made me calm, and when she put the spinal block in, I barely felt anything. Praise God. Once they started, it was the most surreal thing I'd ever seen felt or heard. I could feel the pulling and tugging of the instruments, and I could here the clipping/etc (won't go into details...)

Once he was out though, all worth it. They danced him out of my belly and lowered the curtain so I could see just him. Kelly and Emily kept me calm through the whole thing also, so I was not hysterical evaluate of the noises or tugs I was feeling. God helped me through it, and I will be forever grateful. 

Once done with that, they held him to my cheek once he was cleaned up. I will never forget the soft cheek against mine and what that sweet baby felt like. No other feeling in the world can beat that one. Kelly was then able to take him out to the waiting room to show everyone. Mom said he was so proud, and looked like a daddy. He is such a great daddy. Kelly said he felt instant love wash over him too as soon as he saw them dance Parker out of my belly. So cool.

Once out of the OR, I had the shakes and itching sensation that is normal with the anesthesia. They sent me back to a room, and one by one I got to see everyone. Finally, I got to go to my real room, and then we were able to get Parker back. At that time he did not have a name, and it took us up until the last day to decide on his name. Parker was so perfect for him though, it fits his face for some reason. Isaac means laughter, and I could not leave that out because of the laughter I felt when I found out I was having him, and at the end when nothing went right ( well, so I thought according to "my" plans, not Gods). God showed me through this that I need to be like Abraham, giving up everything, even my son, to him so he can work in powerful ways. Thank you God for my wonderful baby. I just finished nursing him, and never in a million years did I ever think I'd be a mom; but it is the best occupation I have or will ever have.

Waiting game..

Well, no baby yet. Almost 2 weeks since due date, and dr is trying to get me to induce. Setting an induce date for next Monday we think; he had me scheduled for last night, but we did not have a peace about it. 

Will post again hopefully this weekend after baby is here... Crossing fingers. 

Sleepless.

Sleepless nights. Constant stress. Panic attacks. Angry and violent people. Excruciating pelvic pain. Locked doors. Fear. This is our life this week.

God has a plan though; he will provide a place and way for us. I have faith and have decided to not worry about it; even when we are feeling our most vulnerable and weak and in the eyes of a predator. God is in control. Always. My faith in that statement is being tested though this weekend and week. I know Kelly is struggling as well. I needed to type this somewhere to verbally state that I do believe God is in control. The devil can leave us alone, in Jesus name. Please pray for our small family as we wade through some tough environments and decisions in this season of our life.

On top of that, no baby yet. Ready for him to get here.

-B

Dear Baby Boy..

So, did I mention last post that I was very very prego? :) wellll, No-Name Hughes is due March 3rd.. I guess I should say "was due". He has decided he likes it in my tummy much more than coming out to see me on the outside. I don't blame him though, from what I've read, labor is hard on both moms and babies. All of the stress that comes along with being pushed out of a small opening must be hard to accept (sorry if that's too, erm, "gross". But this is real life!;)

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Pregnancy has not treated me well so far little one. But you are worth it. Just to give you an idea though (and so I can whine about it ;), here's a list of pain I have gone through: feet swelling, 7-8 straight months of nausea at random times of the day (mostly in the AM making surviving getting around and ready for work difficult), back pain, unexplainable pelvic pain, and Socratic nerve pain so terrible I could not walk (I thought you were going to make an early entrance-- but it's been very much the opposite case!). But like I said, oh so worth it. 

Right now, you don't have a name in my mind. Everyone has been calling you Parker (Allen Hughes), but I just have to see what you look like first before I decide. Isaac is another name I love, it means laughter. I also love that Isaac in the bible was used as a symbol of his dads obedience to God. 

I wonder if you will have blonde, brown, or red hair? I had red hair as a baby when I was born, and Kelly was bright blonde for a long time. As for eye color, even if your eyes are blue when you are born, I bet they will turn green eventually. Your dad's eyes are the prettiest green, and mine changed from blue to green all growing up, but now they are a solid green most of the time. 

Right now you are moving on my right side, kicking at the top and bottom of my stomach. Guess you are stretching. Seems at night that you like to wake up around 12 and then 4:30am when I go to bed at our normal time of 8:30pm. Tonight though I couldn't sleep. I had a terrible migraine earlier today and had a nap, so now I'm wide awake. You do like to move though, and that will be your dads and my most missed part of pregnancy. Feeling and watching you move around in my now quite large belly. Ill have to show you the terrible stretch marks you caused me when you get older, so you can see how big it really was ;)

Your dad is snoozing right now, but tonight before he went to bed (like most nights) he talked to you in my belly and told you that he loved you and said to hurry up and get here. He loves you so much, we both do, and he is so excited to have a buddy around to ride fourwheelers/tractors/horses with. And if you decide you don't like doing those things, that's ok too- we cannot wait to see what type of hobbies and interests you end up discovering.

Ok, my letter/note is done for now. Will try and sleep, and not to be too anxious for you to come. You have been moving and active the whole time I've been writing this. I will definitely miss the feeling of little kicks and stretches with me at all times.

Love,

Your Mom